Thursday, October 15, 2009

Gay Guy in Seminary: Day 060 (Poetry)

A few of us we asked to rewrite the Lord's prayer or write some poetry inspired by the Lord's prayer for chapel this morning. Most of the readings were modernized versions of what you would find in any Bible. For whatever reason, the Spirit led me to write a satire, which is one of my favorite ways of communicating anyway. Plus, it makes people laugh. I was little nervous because everyone else seem more serious, but it was the one that I wrote, so I read it. Luckily, no lightning bolts came through the ceiling to stop us from finishing the service. It went over really well actually, I just get nervous any time I do a satire, 'cuz I worry people will think I'm serious. turns out, they really liked all of our poems, and now they want to distribute them to the whole campus. Who knew? LOL.

The Lord’s Prayer [Holier Than Thou Translation]

Our Father, who art in heaven,

On your puffy white cloud,

What the heck are you doing up there?

You made everything,

You see everything,

You control everything,

So don’t you think it’s time for you to get down here to start fixing some things!

Don’t you see the blasphemy that these people want to do in your church?

Aren’t you getting just a little bit upset at how wrong all these people are?

I demand justice!

I demand retribution!

Get these people out of here, so I can have my nice little church back,

And no one has to get hurt.

I mean, really?

Do we really need them?

How important are they anyway?

Does it really matter what we do to them?

Or what we say behind their backs?

Because what they don’t know doesn’t hurt them, right?


I am ready to receive your instructions,

I will follow your laws to the letter,

Except for the ones that don’t make any sense,

For thine is the kingdom,

And the power,

And the glory forever.


We also had our second poetry night tonight. It was kind of late notice, so there was only four of us there, but it was pretty cool nonetheless. Laura ran it tonight, and she based it off of what her poetry group used to do, which is writing for 15 minutes on a prompt. My prompt was a picture of a sand dollar in the water. I haven't come up with a title for it yet, but this is the poem I came up with:

It was just beneath the water,

A tiny broken thing,

A sand dollar with a hole on top,

White against the sand,

Stripped of life,

Made clean, you could say.

Some people say life can be unclean,

You dirty yourself through the living,

Though life itself is supposed to be a gift.

Can it be true that the only way to protect the gift,

Is to take it away?

If you find a whole one,

And crack it open,

You can find tiny pieces of shell inside,

Shaped like little white doves,

But this one has been cracked by the waves,

Cracked by life,

And the doves,

The doves flew away.

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